The Failproof Truth
by MadBlossomingPrincess
Summary: The girls are tired of being hurt because guys just aren't into them... so they're writing a book so they can figure out if a guy's into them or not!


MBP: Idea for this gotten by the book (and movie I guess) **He's Just Not That Into You**. Great movie, hilarious book, liked the idea that wouldn't leave my head.

Rini: We hope you enjoy it!

Kio: MBP owns nothing!

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><p><em><strong>The Fail-proof Truth<strong>_

_How to know if he's "Just Not That Into You"... An informal research paper by Mana Katsura. _

Mana frowned and deleted the title off the paper and thought about what she wanted it to be. This was supposed to be a joke, some stupid sleepover idea that popped out and never actually happened, but... Mana and her friends had enough bad relationships that she thought it might actually be a good thing to write about. And then send to evil ex-boyfriends with a vindictive and nasty revenge note attached.

Okay, maybe not that last part, but Mana thought they all needed how to figure out how to know if a guy liked them or just wanted to get in their pants.

She sighed, laying her head on the desk wearily. This was how she was starting her summer, tired and depressed because her latest boyfriend was an idiot and she broke up with him. "Blah..." Mana groaned, letting her fingers press random buttons of the keyboard before deleting them, completely bored.

There was a sleepover tomorrow though, so at least there was something to look forward to.

Mana rolled her eyes and typed again, thinking before she bothered to press any keys at all.

_"He's Just Not That Into You"- How to know the good guys from the jerks._ Delete.

_A Self-Help Guide for Teenage Girls- He's Into You, or In Your Pants_ Delete.

_No Excuses Girls, This is Truth: "He's Just Not That Into You"._

Mana looked at the last one, pleased with herself. It was actually semi-bearable. Now, to continue...

~~()~~()~~()~~

He's Just Not That Into You If He's Not Asking You Out

People say that men run the world. Well, it's true. They get the better jobs (most the time), parents tend to favor sports-oriented males more (especially fathers), and they are traditionally the more powerful ones in a relationship. Seriously. With gay male couples, they call the less dominant one the girl of the relationship.

Kinda makes you think, doesn't it? Wonder what guys really think of us girls? Yeah, so do many, many, MANY females in the world.

Anyways, guys are the ones who "rule the world". So, why is it so hard for them to actually come up to us and say the simple words- "Will you go out with me?"

And no, it's not the expected answer of that they're lame. Very rarely is it because they're socially challenged, or too shy, or too overcome by our beauty, (because we are all beautiful women that deserve good men). Men are not that perfect to be that way.

But they are simple. Because too often, the reason they don't ask us out is because they are just not that into us.

And yet, we make excuses for them. Want to see a few? Good, they're right below.

1. The handy "Maybe he doesn't want to ruin the friendship" excuse (only for people you've been friends for a long time with, or a guy you're really REALLY close to). -Yeah, not true. If a guy likes you, and is attracted to you in any way, he'll say "screw the friendship, I want more", and then he'll make a move. If they were really excited about us, they'd be falling all over themselves to tell us.

2. The "Maybe he's intimidated by me" excuse.-Ah, the wonderful intimidation excuse... LIES! IT'S ALL LIES! Ahem, anyways, if a guy likes you, he won't actually be intimidated. If you've got a strong personality, he'll respect you for that, and love it in the end. Sure, it might take a little longer for him to get the guts to ask you out, but he will. Trust me, he won't be able to resist... especially if you add a wink or a smile!

3. The "Maybe he wants to take it slow" excuse. -Slow. Slow is never a word that you want to use when getting asked out. Taking it slow is for when you're in a relationship and you don't want to go crazy, have sex, and end up with a baby before you're ready for one. Fast is asking out. If for some reason the guy needs to take it slow for personal reasons, but he REALLY LIKES YOU, he'll let you know ASAP. As soon as possible meaning immediately. He won't make you wait.

4. The "Maybe he forgot to remember me" excuse. -Um... how does he forget to remember you? Really girls? He has your number, and it seemed like you really hit it off and then he never calls? No. If he doesn't call, he's just not that into you. Sorry.

Now, those are just a few excuses girls make for guys. Raise a hand if you've actually used at least one of them for the guy you liked. Don't worry, be honest, I raised my hand too. So, now that we know a few excuses for why guys don't ask us out, you may be wondering, "Why don't we just go ask them out?"

Don't. Don't wonder, don't think of it, don't do it.

Guys that like you will ask you out. Guys that aren't into you won't. It's rather simple that way.

Girls like to be asked out. Guys like asking the girls they like out. That old-fashioned ideal is still in effect, and you know what, we all love it. Sure, maybe some girl asked a guy out and they end up in love, happily married and have twenty billion kids around, but that is not normal. She's an exception.

There aren't many exceptions in the world. So don't count on being that exception. For your sakes, try not to be.

Plus, what we don't realize is that if we just wait, and we make the guy work to get our attention, we actually have more power than the guys. They have to chase us, they have to plan their next move, and they make all the romantic little schemes to capture our hearts. All we have to do is go along. It's more free, more powerful, and truthfully, a lot more fun to have the guy do all the work.

Also, it's a lot less stressful, which is good, because stress leads to acne, and acne is bad.

So, finally, this is what you should have learned during this...

1. Excuses are a rejection, however polite they are. Guys are willing to risk friendships if they really like you.

2. Don't ask him out. Don't give him more power. He's already got enough power helping to run the world, remember? Take some of that power off his hands and make him work for you.

3. He can find you, just as easily as you can find him. Easier if he's got connections or you live in some tiny little area where everyone knows each other.

4. Just because you want to lead the relationship or help it along doesn't mean you should. The whole guy-ask-girl thing has been around a while and it's never gone away. Normally means that there's a reason for it like... IT WORKS!

5. A guy that likes you NEVER forgets he likes you. So don't even think of picking up the phone to call him, or if you have it in your hand, put it down. Sign out of your email, any chat room he's about to be in, and off that webcam girls. Don't try initiating conversation. He will remember you if he likes you.

6. You are good enough to be asked out. Yes. We. Are. We are all wonderful, beautiful, talented young women that don't need to do all the work, because we are good enough to be asked out by someone who cares about us.

Remember girls, don't ask him out, don't call him unless he called you first, and above all, YOU WILL BE ASKED OUT!

~~()~~()~~()~~

"Mana, Miho's hungry! Will you get Miho food?" Miho looked pathetic with the puppy dog eyes and the pout.

"Sure! Anyone else want something? I'll raid Mahado's stash!" Mana said, grinning at her friends happily. Miho was by the bed, clapping at the idea of food, Kisara was reading a book, and Amane was spinning in Mana's computer chair.

"Ice cream!" Amane ordered, raising her hand. "Vanilla please!"

Mana's eyes lit up at the order. "Wait, who wants banana splits?"

Three voices chorused in favor of banana splits. Kisara offered to help, but Mana shoved the book back into her hand before skipping away.

Amane checked to make sure Mana was going to be out of sight for a while and then opened up Mana's laptop eagerly.

"What are you doing?" Kisara asked quietly, watching Amane grin deviously as she typed in Mana's password.

"Seeing what she's been up to," Amane answered easily, waving Miho and Kisara over. Miho jumped up immediately, while Kisara went over a little more hesitantly. "Ooh, what's this? Self-help?" "Mana's into self-help stuff?" Kisara asked incredulously, drawn in despite herself.

"Miho doesn't get it. What's self-help?" Her friends rolled her eyes good-naturedly and Amane opened the document.

_No Excuses Girls, This is Truth: "He's Just Not That Into You"._

Amane scanned over the words eagerly, reading some out loud while Kisara started to freak out that they were invading their best friend's privacy. Miho didn't care, chiming in with Amane from time to time about the writing.

Mana raised her eyebrows when she walked in the room and saw the three crowded around her laptop. Amane was presently reading about the "maybe he's intimidated by me" excuse, and Mana cleared her throat, instantly making the other three girls recoil and apologize frantically.

Mana didn't really care that they were in her laptop; she'd been expecting them to do it anyways. Except for when they were at Amane's, they found some way to hack into each other's laptops and find out what had been going on. They'd started it when Amane discovered some porn some perv had sent to Kisara.

Of course, they'd teased Kisara for a bit before they found out who sent it and got revenge for their quiet friend with a few well chosen pieces of YouTube videos.

Amane was the first to recover. "I want to write some of it too!"

"Miho too!"

"Really?" Mana grinned at her excited friends. "I thought you'd like it!"

"I want the topic of um... let me think for a moment!" Amane started muttering to herself about some of her ex-boyfriends darkly.

"Miho wants 'he's just not that into you if he's not dating you'!" Miho called out, likely thinking of Amane's brother Ryou. They'd been super close for years, and they would hang out, but never anything meaningful.

"I know what I want!" Amane said at last. "I want 'he's just not that into you if he's having sex with someone else'!"

Again, able to predict. Amane's biggest crush in the world, the one that she'd never confessed to, was the biggest man-whore in the universe. Marik Ishtar often had sex with older women, or so he claimed. Mana was of the opinion that Marik was a stripper and that's how he found his women.

"Um..." Kisara interrupted the group quietly. "Could I do one?"

There was shocked silence before all the girls cheered and started pestering Kisara about her topic. They all knew it had something to do with Seto Kaiba, the only boy Kisara had ever dated at all, even for the shortest of time.

"I want... 'He's just not that into you if he's disappeared on you'..." Kisara said quietly, looking at the ground. The other girls scowled as they remembered how Seto had disappeared one day and when he came back, he'd been completely mean and cold to their quiet friend.

"Good topic!" Mana said, clapping her hands and reclaiming her laptop. "When do you think you'll have them done?" "I think we should have them at our next sleepover, next week!" Amane offered, laughing as Mana spun the chair faster.

"Miho thinks so too!"

"I can get it done..."

Mana nodded. "Okay, so we're all set! Now... who want banana splits?"

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><p>MBP: That's it! Hope you enjoyed!<p>

Rini: Tell us what you think! Oh, and tell us which person you want to tell theirs next! That way you get to see what you want first! Taking an informal vote here! Amane, Miho, or Kisara!

Kio: Um... the one who gets the most reviews saying they want theirs up will be the next one!

MBP: Please review!

Kio: Jaa nee!


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